Administrative note: this article on We-Space letters substack is a summary of everything that has been happening to me since January 2026, including new directions and new articles.
I can’t write about everything in one post or on one substack (well I can, but nobody will read it). So there are now two new substacks, Relational Erotic Intelligence (the headquarters of my book As Lovers Do, with many articles and podcasts), and Relational Attunement Before Strategy: Stories of collective creation that works. This is stories of people and projects which have succeeded because they started from a place of coherence.
Purpose 1: Authentic Relating and my own development
I am obsessed with development. Mine in particular. This is not an entirely narcissistic exercise, as I consider my own life and struggles a fractal of the “polycrisis” [Charles Eisenstein]. I write about my development because I have to and because I am trying to make sense of it myself. Hopefully you will derive some solace and inspiration from it, and maybe some resources. If it’s of interest, then like, comment, share or connect with me (replies to the email work well).
I am, first and foremost, an Authentic Relating evangelist. AR is, from my perspective, the most powerful and exciting human transformational modality ever invented. And as I have shared before, it’s also open-source, grass-roots under distributed leadership, and relatively affordable or even free. The “One True Religion”, as I joke.
Ten years into it and I am still going strong. I am actually doubling-up, which is the topic of this post. Minimal commercial intent here, although I do get the occasional client from it for my AR program, Authentic Relating in Community which rocks and is quite affordable.
So let me continue exploring the purpose question, and end with the important question of money.
Purpose 2: Marriage and partnership (the 2nd substack, Relational Erotic Intelligence)
Marriage and partnership is actually my original purpose, what got me into this mess to begin with, so to speak. I assumed that two high-level AR players, Sophie and I, would be able to figure this one out. And we did, more or less, for the first 6 months of our life together.
However, as per my usual, I hugely under-estimated the difficulties of two high-strung (dare I say “neurotic”), brilliant, opinionated people, one of whom (me) carrying a history of addiction and mental-health issues. Any sober person would not have bet on our relationship succeeding.
Well, I have good news! We are still together. If you have been rooting for me from the sidelines, sending positive vibes, it worked! However, I had to go to hell and back to discover that I was the cause of most of the problems in my marriage.
I may write about this later. Right now it’s still kind of raw.
Purpose 3: Intentional Community and Regenerative Culture (the 3rd substack, Relational Attunement)
Now we get to the third leg of my purpose stool, a project near and dear to my heart: Intentional Community. I had already written about this in The Dream Is Alive, Part 2, the dream being an IC which would be sourced from the deep-resonant we-space field. But after recently spending 2 ½ weeks at a regenerative culture experiment in Denmark called Regenera, the project has taken a new, exciting and urgent turn.
👉 Continue reading: The Regenera Experiment: Creating Deep Resonant Fields [In production]
Money, Self-Worth and More
This last section is in direct response to my mother: Who is going to pay for all this? I am confirming that yes, indeed, I had been thinking the same thing!
As my purpose matures and my 3 platforms develop, I have been asking myself this question a lot. I am living on a modest social security pension, while writing as a hobby. I am deeply grateful for my pension, but it funds a simple lifestyle and nothing more. The royalties on all my books currently don’t even cover my car insurance.
One of the options I considered was to “bite the bullet” and go back to work in corporate tech, such as AI implementation and training, that I would be very good at. The problem there is that I would have to take 6-12 months out of my life to apprentice and train. I do believe that we are in the greatest opportunity for wealth creation that the world has ever seen, particularly for tech- and management types. However, this option would be costly: a year of retraining, at sixty-six, traded against the years I’d rather spend on AR, partnership, and community.
I will be honest: I sweated bullets over this. I follow a few career-advice substacks (I particularly like Alex McCann and Scott Barker) and I am more or less following Scott Barker’s advice “find a big problem you are passionate about”. You have probably seen the “Ikigai” diagram on the choice of the ideal career:
What helped me to decide were several quite generous donations to the Circling Guide Anthology (3rd edition) crowd-funder, now near $5,000; the most I’ve ever earned in my life from writing.
I haven’t yet figured this one out. The “big problem” I am taking on is a lifetime dream: How to live a life in community with people I love, changing the world together. I am not sure where the money will come from, but I will continue networking around this project. Networking is not immediately monetizable (for now it’s a lifestyle project, not a business). But I am quite good at it, and there is no question there is a value-added there.
To everyone who supported the crowd-funder: thank you for helping me make the decision to take a leap of faith, in favor of my writing and community-building.
And now, the opportunities…
First, I will be running another cohort of Authentic Relating in Community in June-July, which I am now offering on the gift economy starting at just $100 (normal price is $350). Reach out if that’s of interest.
Second, consider donating to the Circling Guide crowd-funder or else becoming a paid subscriber to this substack.
Third, I am looking for people to join us and live in community. I want a community of cultural creatives which is fundamentally sourced from the deep resonant we-space. That’s the big announcement, I am pulling the trigger on this project. However long it takes. We don’t know the location yet (maybe Portugal). But if this is a project that interests you, then like, comment and share the above post. Or talk to me. I am easy to reach via email or Linkedin.
